Me: Dear Windows, please let me take a file from my desktop and put it on a thumb drive.

Windows: No, no, how about I open up internet explorer and kick open some popups?

Me: No, why would you even think to do that? Close.

Windows: Are you sure? How about I just open it in a new tab or 3?

Me: NO! I don’t even want Internet Explorer open. I don’t even watch porn on you, why are you so buggy?

Windows: Fine, I’m taking my operating system and going home. /crash/

<repeat ad infinitum>